Tuesday, March 8, 2011

My first blackout

When I first started drinking I for some reason stuck only to hard alcohol. I couldn't stand beer at the time so I usually just mixed vodka or rum with whatever I could and get decently shitfaced. One night I went a little overboard. 

We were all at a party in my friends backyard and things were going great....I'm not sure exactly when I went from "pleasantly buzzed" to "obnoxious drunk" but I crossed that line and then some. The crazy thing about blackouts is that when people tell you what you did, you can almost picture yourself doing it, but have no memory of it whatsoever. 

The things I was told I did were:
  • Try and take a shit on the lawn
  • then chase people with my hands after taking a shit
  • groped a 15 (possibly 14) year old girl
  • Told a 26 year old man to hit me as hard as he can in the face
  • repeat everyones names I could remember
  • compliment a girl's top because it did a nice job of showing her cleavage
When I was first told that I did all of this, I was sure that people were just messing with me, but eventually I accepted that I made a total ass out of myself that night. Didn't surprise me though that I told the guy to hit me though, I've done it before while drunk but with not quite as large of men. I guess I was out cold for like 10 minutes and I guess he knocked my ear ring out off of me and gave me a nice bloody lip. The groping though lead to quite some stress. Though in my defense the girl in question is the very defintion of jail bait and as the story goes, a friend of mine asked her if it was ok for me to touch her boob (why? I have no clue) and she said ok. So I went for the feel, and I guess muscle memory just took over since usually when I' groping a boob I try to get under the shirt so when I did that people had to pull me off or whatever. 

The night raised some interesting questions though. Does booze turn people into raging douche bags or does the alcohol just bring out the true self and underneath it all I'm just an obnoxious perv? Still not sure what the answer is though, think it's a little bit of both. I abstained from alcohol for a bit until I eventually learned to hold my liquor...that is until my next blackout. But that's a whole other story. 


  1. Oo, quite a tough time there. :S Personally, I've taken my drinking "experience" slow as I grew older, and since the only time I "rage" was with my bros in a secure location, I've kind of eased myself in to allow myself a somewhat reasonable "smashed" self. I've been told I'm like super chill (I'd like to think like normal) when I'm smashed, and the only major thing that I've done that surprised me when I've been smashed was asked a girl straight up to make out, which I don't usually bluntly do. Worked out tho. ;p

  2. I see nothing wrong with this.

  3. Whenever I drink too much, I end up in a ball on the floor crying to myself.

    Doodles and Dreams

  4. lol Blackouts are quite fun though :P just hearing about all the crazy stuff you did can give you a good laugh :)

  5. thats crazy, makes my drunken escapades seems like nothing lol

  6. LOL I always hate hearing about the stuff I did that I can't remember. I think booze just brings out your inner demons, and definitely ruins your judgement.

  7. I got super drunk with some friends once. My only regret is not remembering when a particularly drunk and innocent friend found my anal beads and put them on his ear and went, "hey look, earring"

  8. Great read. I'm so guilty of shitting on lawns at partys too.

  9. what a crazy stuff but its good enternainment

  10. well, you are brave to explore the possibility that that is your true poo-handed self unleashed by alcohol. perhaps wiser however to just blame it on the booze.

  11. Haha, I remember the first time I blacked out... well, not really... but I remember the things that lead up to my first time blacking out! It was a fun night (I guess)

  12. Heh, can so find myself in this post! Apart from the pooping on the lawn part.. lol

    Followed, come check out mine once you have the time :)

  13. Thank you so SO much for posting this.

    Month or two ago I had near enough exactly the same thing happen to me. It felt sooo bad man. It's comforting to know I'm not the only one :)

    After reflecting on it, I think experiencing stuff like that come from yourself teaches you a harsh but necessary lesson about people. Just learn from it and move on.